To Go Or Not To Go, That Is The Question

Do I attend my 20th high school reunion this November? 

I keep in touch with only three people from high school.  It used to be four but one of them went all hard-core Mormon, but that is a post for another day. 

Unlike Bob, I do not have friends hassling me about attending.  Of my current HS friends, one is absolutely not going, the other wants to go but probably won’t because his wife’s reunion is the same night and the other said she will go but only if I go. 

For the most part, I do not have a lot of warm and fuzzy memories about my high school days. It's not as if I harbor any ill-will towards the other 260-something people I graduated with in 1987, it's more apathy and complete indifference.  Those feelings also extend to what they’ve become and/or done over the past 20 years. 

Cost is also an issue.  The price would be $130 for me and Bob.  For that money I would rather go to Morton’s and have a great steak rather than the riggi-chickie-piggy that will probably be served at the reunion.  (Note to new diners at Morton’s -- it is a LIVE lobster on the tray they bring to your table).   Plus there is the cost of a babysitter, a new outfit (of course) and probably drinks.

On the other hand, there is the voyeuristic side of me that would like to see these folks just to see if I have aged better than them.  Living well is the ultimate revenge, right? I'd like to think that I look good for 38, but sometime a girl need reassurance. 

Bob pointed out that I did have a good time at his 25th reunion even though I didn't know many people.  That, however, was mainly due to the fact that I found someone with a similar sense of humor who was more than willing to watch, and sarcastically comment on, the antics that were going on. HI CATHY!  I doubt I'd have the freedom to do that with it being my reunion.  Secretly, I think Bob wants to hear stories about my HS days to find out what I was like back then, but ultimately I think he would be disappointed.  I can tell you dear readers that I went my entire Freshman year without speaking to anyone other than the girl with whom I shared a locker. 

I am just not sure what to do.  And therein, as the Bard would tell us, lies the rub.  I keep waiting to see if the coordinators of the reunion will post a list of all who have responded, but nothing yet.  I guess I'll continue to take a "wait and see" attitude until the very last minute.

Comments

[Joe]

Yes, of course, go. Once you get through the slight panic and the strong desire to turn around as you enter the hotel or reunion place, you see somebody you know and haven't seen, you catch up with them, then see somebody else, and on and on, until four hours whiz by and it's over. It will be worth weeks of post reunion conversation...and that will last you for another 20 years.

I also suggest that you make out with an old boyfriend in the bathroom. Bob will understand. And you deserve it. Reunions are a no penalty zone for borderline adultery. Every spouse should understand that.

[Cathy]

Dear Mrs. Subdivided,

I am flattered that I helped make Bob's/my reunion bearable. :-) I understand your angst. If it weren't for my stepbrother (also a fellow classmate of Bob's and mine) who was asking me to go, I probably would have passed on the reunion too. As it turned out, I had a fabulous time with you and Bob and a few others that pleasantly surprised me. Will I attend a future reunion? Very likely not. Even though the experience was better than expected, the "pecking order" remains very similar to what it was 25 years ago. Plus, the cost versus food/facility didn't quite equal. :-) So, while it was great to see you and Bob, in hindsight it probably wasn't the best idea to go. Do they have a "reduced rate" portion of the reunion...such as paying $20 for coffee/dessert later in the evening? That would be what I would suggest if it's an option. Otherwise, I'd suggest spending the $130 for a date night for the two of you. :-)

[Bob]

Joe, making out with an old boyfriend is out for Mrs. Subdivided, since I wasn't given a similar option with an ex g-f at my reunion.

However, if Mrs. Subdivided wants to make out with a female classmate, I'm totally on board.

[Mountain Mama]

I say, if it's that expensive, and you're feeling this ambivalent, save your money. Call the folks you really want to see and go to happy hour with them some Friday night.

Or spring to bring Cathy along. She sounds like a blast. :-)

[Julie]

Dearest hubby: I don't even recall you pointing out that there was a former HS girlfriend in attendance.

Dearest Joe: I didn't have a boyfriend in high school. Plus I have a habit of dating men who live many, many miles away from me...starting in Northern Virginia and ending up in England. Bob was the first date from the Pittsburgh area.

[Cathy]

Mountain Mama... Thank YOU! :-)

Julie... I didn't have a boyfriend in high school either. I didn't even go to our prom. I was married to a man from England... maybe I should start looking in Northern Virginia (where two cousins of mine live)... or Pgh since I don't seem to have any luck here in Houston. :-)

[Joe]

Come on...there must be some guy you wanted to make out with, wished for, hoped for? Find that guy. Make out with that guy. Or girl. Remember...
Reunion = no penalty zone. If Bob is cool about it, he gets to watch.

[Bob]

Joe -- so if and when we have a Syracuse TRF Sequence 43 reunion, who are you going for?

[Joe]

I'll eschew all of your former TRF ladies as I make a bee line for Vern's wife.

[Mountain Mama]

Cathy, you're welcome. :-)

I didn't really date in HS either. My junior year I did have a date for my prom. This guy, who was a friend, said he'd take me "if no one else asked me." No one did, so we went. I was bored out of my mind.

My senior year I declared that if no one asked me, I wouldn't go. No one did, I didn't, and I have no regrets.